Updated: Apr 8, 2020
Last weekend I had the pleasure of attending a workshop by the fabulous healer, Stella Brookes. It was a workshop for female light workers who have incarnated during this new energy transition and have big missions they need to step into. We looked at our soul wounds as individuals and as a collective. We spent time learning about specific wounds from this life and previous lives and worked as a group to release and heal them. It was an intense but wonderful weekend.
The main theme of the weekend was about women stepping into their power and working together to rise up. Something I'm personally very passionate about. Contrary to some people's beliefs, there is no 'man bashing' or 'hating'. It's more about focusing on bringing women back together after years, centuries and past lives of being pitted against each other, told we have no worth or value in the world, and to be silent. Don't forget the witch trials, where any woman at all who had intuition and gifts (which every single one has us has by the way) was accused of witchcraft and burnt at the stake. A time when women were encouraged to turn on each other and many innocent women were murdered (I need to add here that being a lightworker doesn't mean you're a witch and being a witch doesn't mean you're a lightworker. Neither are 'bad' and you can be both at the same time. It's how you use your gifts that count!). It's time to release all of that gunk and rise up.
There was talk of how women need to support each other and not compete or shame. If you know me, you know this is what I stand for. Having said that, I have seen in the community lately a few things that have broken my heart. When you find a Tribe of women under the essence of 'women supporting women', there are certain rules you need to acknowledge to keep this powerful connection (I know - rules schmools, but hear me out)...
...there are certain things that can break a code or pact. And unless you acknowledge your behaviour, rectify/apologise/make amends / make changes, the actions can cause great pain and push women even further away from each other. For example, if you both work in similar industries and cite 'collaboration over competition', but take another woman's work/idea and then pass it off as your own, you break the code. If you aggressively take a fellow Tribe's clients with underhanded tactics, like slating a piece of work they do, to sell your own work, you break the code. If you silently sit in groups noting down insight but never share yours, then take the insight to better yourself and yourself alone, you break the code. If you sit in circle or hold space for a woman to be vulnerable then you use it as a weapon, you break the code. If you sleep with the partner or husband of one of your Tribe and continue to look your sister in the eye every time you meet whilst she is unaware of your betrayal, you break the code. If you harbour bad feelings towards another member of the Tribe (this happens by the way - we don't like everyone and that's ok. It doesn't always mean that person is bad - they just aren't your people. You can still love them from afar!) and cannot keep those feelings under control so push her out through bullying, you break the code. Now, no one is perfect and we all make mistakes so there is no judgment from me if you are reading this and have done any of the above or similar. Where the healing takes place is when you look at your own behaviour and make amends. I have seen it so often when boundaries have been crossed, someone has highlighted and asked for acknowledgment and the 'perpetrator' suddenly becomes the accuser and victim. Instead of taking a look at herself, she immediately hits defence and starts playing the victim. Turning everything back round onto the woman who quite rightly, flagged a crossed boundary with the hope to resolve and move on with love. What I am asking here is we cannot heal the female wounds if we still betray each other, don't accept the betrayal and either pretend it didn't happen, or become the accuser. We cannot mend our broken hearts this way. We all hurt each other (even by accident). No one is innocent. But please please consider your sisters in all of this. We need to do a better job of coming together - even when we mess up. If you can't mend or fix the wound, accept and let go with love and move on. Spouting hatred as a defence does not solve anything and will never bring women back together.
If you have been a woman affected by another woman breaking the code - your job is to forgive. Of course you don't have to have them in your life (but if you feel you can then that's amazing!), but release the bad feelings and forgive, let go and move on. You're entitled to feel pain to begin with. You're allowed to seek counsel with your closest friends about the issue. But then send love and let go. You deserve the be at peace.
We are all worth more than this.
To any woman I've hurt, "I'm sorry. I love you. Please forgive me." 🙏🏽
With love to you all,